Author: Grace
Introduction
Homeschooling is a practice mostly performed by those who have never experienced it. By parents who had a more typical childhood for their country and culture than what they provided for their own children. No matter how successful homeschooling is for a family, and no matter how the grown children eventually feel about it, one thing that will always be true is that the parents cannot understand what it is like to be homeschooled if they themselves were not homeschooled. They can understand whatever motivated them to homeschool, whether it be religious beliefs, educational philosophy, or special family circumstances such as moving frequently. They can approach homeschooling with their adult maturity, good and bad memories of traditional schooling, and vision of providing something superior for their own children. However, they will not understand what it is like to be raised outside of mainstream educational institutions, and to have the exceptional be your default assumed existence, an upbringing some homeschool graduates have likened to that of a third culture kid. See this article and this video. As someone who grew up in the United States like my parents did, I personally would not claim the third culture kid label solely for having been homeschooled. However, the fact that some homeschool graduates do demonstrates how growing up homeschooled can lead to a feeling of differentness in adulthood.
In the following article series, I will share my homeschooling story. I will discuss what happened over the years, as well as how my emotional life and understanding of the world evolved throughout time. I will mention my parents, siblings, and people we knew, but will give no identifying details. To make a few things clear: first of all, this is not an attack piece on my parents. They had good intentions and mostly did a good job at raising us homeschooled. I still had a privileged childhood compared to many. Second, these are my personal experiences, and they do not represent all homeschoolers. For example, see Homeschoolers Anonymous for a large archive of homeschooling stories. My goal in writing this to increase awareness of what homeschooling can potentially look like from a student’s perspective. I hope you find it interesting!
My Early Years of Being Homeschooled (ages 4-8, 2009-2013)
Advanced Academically
To start my homeschooling story at the very beginning, I must go all the way back to the year 2009, when I’d just turned four and my mom began doing a kindergarten curriculum with me. This was not a dramatic transition to a new place that involved teachers, classmates, and separation from my parents. The only change was that I now did a little bit of schoolwork with my mom some days. Every week I learned a new letter, and about something that started with that letter. Every school day I wrote a new number in my chart, counting toward my hundredth day of school. Mom read me the Genesis creation story, and I colored a picture for each of the seven days. I took it literally, and so did my parents. I painstakingly sounded out each word in my reading exercises. The following year, my mom did a phonics curriculum with me, and I learned all the rules, and that apparently a lot of words broke them. As I got better at reading, came to love it, and would devour all the children’s books mom gave me. Homeschooling was working well.
When my brother and I were in kindergarten and second grade respectively, we did a curriculum on different countries and cultures, and this is probably one of my favorite memories from elementary school. I loved reading books about kids from different parts of the world, listening to music, trying new foods, and studying our atlases. Mom was surprised by how quickly my brother and I learned our geography, a pattern which repeated itself with many subjects. She has said we were like “sponges” for information. The work she put in to homeschooling us seemed to be paying off. I still consider those early elementary school years to be a special phase of learning, when you can discover so many things about the world for the first time.
A Happy Family Life
When I wasn’t doing schoolwork or the couple of chores I had daily, I could always find some way to entertain myself. I didn’t often feel lonely or bored. I was especially close with my next-oldest brother, and we spent hours making up weird stories about all our toy dolls and trains. My brother and I even won prizes at our homeschool co-op for being the individual boy and girl who had read the most books that year (yes, they separated it by gender instead of grade level for some reason). My family lived in Florida from when I was six until I was eight, and the beach became a favorite activity. I loved being in the water and collecting the colorful Florida seashells. I still have a whole box of them from about thirteen years ago. Back then, it felt like the world of my home and family was still plenty to explore.
Socialized?
Of course, I also had people in my life besides my immediate family. We went to church, park days, field trips, and homeschooling co-ops when we could. Dad was off at work a lot, but mom was at home all day with us and still wanted friends. So, she met up with other moms to talk, while we kids had a playdate. I was lucky that some of mom’s friends happened to have little girls my age! I felt happy and excited when it was time for these meetups. Back then, I considered any kid close to my age whom I saw repeatedly to be my friend- even if we didn’t actually interact very often. So, in my mind, I had enough friends, just like characters in books and movies. If I was socially behind, I wasn’t aware of it. Though looking back now, I think I was a bit behind. I was spared the stress of bullying and peer pressure in public school, but the tradeoff was less time with peers. It’s impossible to say just how much this aspect of homeschooling affected me though, because I never had anything else with which to compare it.
All That I Knew
What did I think about being homeschooled? Honestly, I don’t recall thinking much about it at all as a young child. It was my default state of existence. I knew what a school was, of course. My favorite characters often went, and so did my neighborhood friends. If I was being difficult, Mom would exclaim something like: “what if you were in a school?”, or “how embarrassing if you did that in a classroom!” On some level, I must have known my lifestyle was different, even if I don’t remember exactly when I first realized this. I never questioned it, never once asked my parents for school. I’m not sure if I fully comprehended that I, personally, could attend a traditional school. It felt like a fictional place to me, like in The Magic School Bus (my favorite show at age eight). In my mind, kids in our family didn’t get on that yellow school bus and go to this mysterious, possibly scary place called “public school” to sit at a desk for hours. We did schoolwork at home with mom and had lots of free time to play. We were Christians, military kids, and homeschoolers. The latter two things on that list might be circumstantial, but I still internalized all three of them as part of my identity at a young age.
Ultimately, my life was different, but not all bad. I was a child with loving parents and a safe home. When I look back on my homeschooling experience, the early elementary years are still the ones about which I have the most positive feelings.
Part 2 is coming soon! Click here if you want to share your own homeschooling story on this website!
Homeschooled Voices 